SLAVE GAMES

Written By Ashley Coffey

June 19, 2019

I want you to picture, for a moment, your middle school gym teacher. Imagine that whistle they had around their neck, the Milgrim Prison Guard grimace they wore like a badge of honor and the visor they wore so often you wondered if they ever washed it.

Am I personifying an agreeable image for you? Who cares, that's not the point. Well actually, maybe it is. I run mazes around stories before getting to the point. So sit still and act interested while I explain what happened one day a P.E. class made the news. 

Most of you may think I'm two seconds away from sharing how another teacher made it into the sex offender registry. Twisted as my sense of humor may be, I find no amusement promoting perverse habits of pedophiles. But, exposing racists, that's a past time I often enjoy. I think of it as a game, a form of entertainment. 

Racism pollutes our air at the same rate as carbon dioxide. This fact is unconfirmed, of course. But when a headline like "A Wisconsin teacher has been placed on leave after telling kids to find games played by enslaved children" crossed my computer screen all I could think was …

"I’d laugh if this story weren’t so reprehensible.”

Did the P.E. teacher slip into a stroke and wake up thinking they were a history teacher? 

"I must teach the youth about the World History of Slave Games,” he thought emphatically. “If I don't who will pass on this knowledge to future generations?"

I know the United States educational system is failing, but I didn't know it was defective. Maybe I'm mistaken, but I wasn't aware passing The P.E. Prep Course for Wisconsinites included:

1. Knowledge of First Aid & CPR
2. Knowledge of Health and Nutrition 
3. Knowledge of Kinesiology Fundamentals
4. Knowledge of Slave Games 

I’m sure the now removed teacher had his motivations. Yes, they may not have been racist. 

But I’m sure the far-from-ample free time of slaves didn’t include games. If games were played, the plantation owner was liable to end them. Slaves picked cotton from sun up to sun down. They weren’t afforded the luxury of leisure time. That’s not what they were not paid to do. 

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